This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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