Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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