I wish i was in the wii world.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
