just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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