Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize