Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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