i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Randomize