I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
