haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize