i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
