Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
