dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
