Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Shame is for Republicans.
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