i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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