this beer tastes like vomit already
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
