It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
