Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
