it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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