More tranny stories later!
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Randomize
