Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
And then my night got REAL pukey
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
