She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize