Screwed.edu
i think my mom watched the whole time
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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