I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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