was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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