its not stalking. its research.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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