is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I am available for nakedness
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
