the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize