She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
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