Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize