2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize