we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
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