I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
All I want is dick and wine.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
