Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
porn star boner night. come get it.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
