I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Randomize
