I wannas sexs uuuuu
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
