either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize