Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
