We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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