White coat. Heels.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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