i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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