also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Someone came in the potted fern
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
