whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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