That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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