One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
