Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
