She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
