I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize