The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
