i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
