Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
